Tuesday, December 21, 2010


Giant dandelion
Originally uploaded by A.G. Photographe

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Drum roll please... and some seltzer.

Writing a post to publish after the big reveal...

I'm pregnant!

And oh my gosh. So sick.

Luckily, I haven't actually been throwing up but man... uhhhhh..

I never knew you could be so starving and so nauseous at the same time.

I guess I thought I'd be more excited, but honestly, I'm just so exhausted I don't even feel very much of anything. I usually can't nap. But I've been napping for like three hours in the afternoon and then sleeping a full eight plus at night. And still soooooo tired.

Definitely not experiencing the wonder of the miracle of life. More like the wonder of the tragedy of morning sickness. Its definitely the longest I've ever felt sick. I've led a sheltered healthy life apparently.

I keep asking Beefygeek "Are you sure I'm pregnant? I don't just have the flu?"

When I look down at my belly button and think... somewhere in there is a tiny little sesame seed sized body... and in the tiny sesame seed sized body is an eternal soul... I just think...

"How the heck is something so tiny making me SO SICK!!???"

Deep. So Deep. I know.

But seriously. Can I really be having a baby? Me? Wow.

wonderful. delightful. un-freaking-believable. :)

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

from glory

Originally uploaded by { karen }
to glory

Wednesday, November 24, 2010


Originally uploaded by Velachery Balu
"...the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now the one who has fashioned us for this very purpose is God, who has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come."

2 Corinthians 4:16-5:5

I'm thankful that any year, every year, even if I have nothing, I have everything.

Friday, November 12, 2010

I have seen the white city

City night lights
Originally uploaded by Rafakoy
"Oh Los Angeles we leave you now
At the setting of your skies
As we leave the comfort of your ground
With your angels we will fly

Well you carried us in broken dreams
Like a mother does her sons
We were scattered 'cross your dirty streets
We were dying one by one

And you held us in your city lights
When our eyes had lost the stars
And we made our peace with lonely nights
And you healed our broken hearts

Well they say the Big One's gonna come
And you'll fall into the sea
We will know that then your work is done
And your angels will go free"

Peter Bradley Adams

Hauntingly beautiful song, go listen to it.

I never thought I'd love the city. But its pretty amazing to think about just how many people live and work and love and die within a few feet of each other.

And someday:

In the land of fadeless day,
Lies “the city foursquare,”
It shall never pass away,
And there is “no night there.”

God shall “wipe away all tears”
There’s no death, no pain, nor fears;
And they count not time by years,
For there is “no night there.”

All the gates shall never close,
To “the city foursquare,”
There life’s crystal river flows,
And there is “no night there.”

There they need no sunshine bright,
In “that city foursquare,”
For the Lamb is all the light,
And there is “no night there."

John R Clements

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Most of all,

Originally uploaded by mikebaird
I miss the sound.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

talking to myself

Evening Falling
Originally uploaded by Ben Heine
Be still, my Soul; the Lord is on thy side.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Eternity in the Hearts of Men


Not talkin' 'bout a year
no not three or four
I don't want that kind of forever
in my life anymore
forever always seems
to be around when it begins
but forever never seems
to be around when it ends
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you

People spend so much time
every single day
runnin' 'round all over town
givin' their forever away
but no not me
I won't let my forever roam
and now I hope I can find
my forever a home
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you

Like a handless clock with numbers
an infinite of time
no not the forever found
only in the mind
forever always seems
to be around when things begin
but forever never seems
to be around when things end
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you

Ben Harper

Such a beautiful song.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

rainy flickr

Because the rain is lovely.

Joshua Radin wrote a song for me!

Originally uploaded by
Cuba Gallery
Not really, but it is called:

"Amy's Song"

You asked me to write a tune
All about the things that go wrong
And then you asked me to come home soon
To the place where I belong

But you stand on the other side
Of the line in this place
And you can't see me, you are blind
And this you can fake
No, this you can fake.

And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.

And I don't know if I can write about
Chosen walls and the things you feel
And I don't know if I can sing aloud
Closing doors showing you what's real

But I know when I close my eyes,
Late at night, there's only one thing
The night's shown that she can lie
Its your face, show me something
Can you show me something

And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.

What do you want me to say
All I know is love - it's ok
I'll write what I know
And you do the same
Tell me I'm sane.

And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.


How terrifying is this phrase:

"Modern birth control methods, the argument goes,
brought us quantity control; the addition of prenatal
testing offers a system of quality control."

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Welcome Home

Clean Sheets
Originally uploaded by Island Spice
Sheets are swaying from an old clothesline,
like a row of captured ghosts, over old dead grass. Was never much, but we made the most.
Welcome Home....

Peel the scars from off my back. I don't need them anymore. You can throw them out or keep them in your mason jars.
I've come home.

Radical Face.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Until I get There

Until I get There
Originally uploaded by Ben Heine
Onward and upward

moving right along folks.

too busy for much of this.

be back Soon.

Monday, August 30, 2010

a satiety of wonder

Speaking of a man first seeing the miracle of sky and storm:

"How different we are who have become jaded with a satiety of wonder. 'It is not by our superior insight that we escape the difficulty,' says Carlyle, 'it is by our superior levity, our inattention, our want of insight. It is not by our thinking that we cease to wonder at it... we call that fire of the black cloud electricity, and lecture learnedly about it, and grind the like of it out of glass and silk: but what is it? Whence it comes? Whither goes it? Science has done much for us; but it is a poor science that would hide from us the great depth of Nescience (absence of knowledge), whither we can never penetrate, on which all science swims as a mere superficial film. This world, after all our science and sciences, is still a miracle; wonderful, inscrutable, magical and more, to whosoever will think of it.'"

AW Tozer and Thomas Carlyle in The Knowledge of the Holy

Monday, August 16, 2010

Swing Wide

I caught myself
Looking in the mirror
Wishing I was someone else
Cause I was born
With a bleeding heart
And veins of loneliness

And I know it,
I’ve seen it,

I’ve held it in my arms
But love can’t seem to break me down

And I’ve pleaded, I’ve begged
And I’ve bloodied my eyes
Just to feel it
To believe it will stick around

Swing wide the glimmering gates

I told myself
The habits and secrets
Were just to get me through
To get me through the nights
But I got lost
In a world of angles
In a city of greys and lies

And I feel it, I taste it
This longing to be free
Oh, the joy of believing like a child

So you, you there listening
Will you send up a prayer
For me
To help me find the light

Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again

One day I believe
I will open up my eyes
To see the good work that was begun
And I’ll be the only thing I’ve ever wanted to be
And I’ll know that I belong

Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again

Words and Music: Andrew Osenga


we saw a "rainbow leaf" as Zackers named it. Autumn is on its way.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Top Five Sci-Fi Univi (thats my new geeky plural for universe)

Because BeefyGeek isn't the only nerd around here.

In no particular order...

-The Ender Universe by Orson Scott Card. It begins with the Hugo winning Ender’s Game. But it doesn’t stop there. Oh no. Nine books in the world so far and he probably has more up his sleeve.

Why I love it:
-First and foremost it is super character driven, I want to name at least one of my children after one of the characters if that tells you how much I love them.
-Great writing.
- Ender is an AMAZING Christ type who just gets better as you keep reading.
-It has some pretty good science-y stuff (i.e. faster than light speed communication, interesting gravity manipulation, cool weapons).
-Really awesome futuristic politics (Card calls it “the great game”)
- It has some myth-like components.
-He portrays children as being real people.
-It has good morals. Sounds like a really boring Christian-y type thing to say, but I can’t help it. I love that the sympathetic characters in the books believe in good and evil and save sex for marriage. I could write for Focus on the Family!
-Good alien/human interaction. I’m very picky about my aliens.

-The Terminator Universe originally by James Cameron.
I grew up watching these movies and they are just a part of me. I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not… ALTHOUGH, I have to say after squealing with delight the first time I saw a preview for CHRISTIAN BALE as JOHN CONNER… I haven’t yet gotten around to seeing Judgement Day. So I may have to re-write this after I do. I also just started The Sarah Conner Chronicles on Netflix… and its awesome. I was soooo disappointed that I couldn’t watch it tonight ‘cause the internet is down.

Why I love it:
-John Conner is just so epically legendary. I mean really… He’s John Conner. I’d follow him into battle with a sling shot and a bike helmet.
- Its scary without being horror. I don’t do horror. At all.
- As a back to nature gal…I distrust machines and look forward to the day when you join me.
- I love Arnold. I can’t help it. He’s just so ridiculous.
-The strong woman I guess… I don’t think of myself as a feminist, but I can’t help loving it when a girl kicks some serious bad guy behind.

-The Firefly/Serenity Universe by Joss Wheadlon. Just discovered this. A few years too late as usual. It’s definitely getting included on my next Favorite Things post. Why I love it:

- Its hilarious.
-It has great ship design. That sounds weird. But it does.
-Really amazing ensemble cast.
- No aliens. “We don’t need no stinking aliens.” This keeps it from feeling too much like Star Wars.
- The whole Union Vs. Confederacy thing going on. I could see it happening.
- Some people hated the who "space western" thing. But I loved it. Space is the final frontier, right? And if we really space traveled everything wouldn't be all shiny everywhere we went.
-River. She’s just amazing. Another girl that kicks butt… I’m starting to see a pattern here.
-I can’t explain but I want to be on that ship in that Universe. That means I love it, right? It just makes you wanna be a part of it.
-What’s not to love? It deserves its own post.

-The Matrix. It’s been talked about enough. It was awesome. References to it creep up everywhere. It’s a great analogy for Christianity, which to me means it tells the True Story. (“…an artist uses lies to tell the truth.”) Plus Neo is so cute. I have a thing for half-Asians.

-The universe of CS Lewis’s Space Trilogy: So this sort of blurs the line between fantasy and sci-fi and religious myth, but seeing as they are three of my favorite books, I’m gonna go ahead and include it. But it needs its own post. Suffice to say CS Lewis wrote it.

Honorable mention to Star Wars…I do love the universe which is technically what this post is about BUT, we just re-watched the more recent movies and… I just can’t bring myself to include it in this list. If only he had stopped before he cast Hayden Christiansen.

Thursday, August 5, 2010


"Then will I sprinkle clean water upon you,
and you shall be clean: from all your filthiness.."

Ezekiel 36:25
11 12 13 14
21 22 23 24
31 32 33 34

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

If you want to make God laugh...

"Higher up and deeper in..."
CS Lewis

"God always answers us in the deeps, never in the shallows of our soul."
Amy Carmichael

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Photographers are magic

How do photographers make stuff look picturesque that is really just junk?
Case in point: this guy. Thanks to this lovely blogger for the recommendation.

Etsy Photography

Sold... but not to me

Etsy favorites that are long gone