Christmas!
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Drum roll please... and some seltzer.
Writing a post to publish after the big reveal...
I'm pregnant!
And oh my gosh. So sick.
Luckily, I haven't actually been throwing up but man... uhhhhh..
I never knew you could be so starving and so nauseous at the same time.
I guess I thought I'd be more excited, but honestly, I'm just so exhausted I don't even feel very much of anything. I usually can't nap. But I've been napping for like three hours in the afternoon and then sleeping a full eight plus at night. And still soooooo tired.
Definitely not experiencing the wonder of the miracle of life. More like the wonder of the tragedy of morning sickness. Its definitely the longest I've ever felt sick. I've led a sheltered healthy life apparently.
I keep asking Beefygeek "Are you sure I'm pregnant? I don't just have the flu?"
When I look down at my belly button and think... somewhere in there is a tiny little sesame seed sized body... and in the tiny sesame seed sized body is an eternal soul... I just think...
"How the heck is something so tiny making me SO SICK!!???"
Deep. So Deep. I know.
But seriously. Can I really be having a baby? Me? Wow.
wonderful. delightful. un-freaking-believable. :)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Thankful
Originally uploaded by Velachery Balu
2 Corinthians 4:16-5:5
I'm thankful that any year, every year, even if I have nothing, I have everything.
Friday, November 12, 2010
I have seen the white city
"Oh Los Angeles we leave you now
At the setting of your skies
As we leave the comfort of your ground
With your angels we will fly
Well you carried us in broken dreams
Like a mother does her sons
We were scattered 'cross your dirty streets
We were dying one by one
And you held us in your city lights
When our eyes had lost the stars
And we made our peace with lonely nights
And you healed our broken hearts
Well they say the Big One's gonna come
And you'll fall into the sea
We will know that then your work is done
And your angels will go free"
Peter Bradley Adams
Hauntingly beautiful song, go listen to it.
I never thought I'd love the city. But its pretty amazing to think about just how many people live and work and love and die within a few feet of each other.
And someday:
In “that city foursquare,”
For the Lamb is all the light,
And there is “no night there."
John R Clements
At the setting of your skies
As we leave the comfort of your ground
With your angels we will fly
Well you carried us in broken dreams
Like a mother does her sons
We were scattered 'cross your dirty streets
We were dying one by one
And you held us in your city lights
When our eyes had lost the stars
And we made our peace with lonely nights
And you healed our broken hearts
Well they say the Big One's gonna come
And you'll fall into the sea
We will know that then your work is done
And your angels will go free"
Peter Bradley Adams
Hauntingly beautiful song, go listen to it.
I never thought I'd love the city. But its pretty amazing to think about just how many people live and work and love and die within a few feet of each other.
And someday:
In the land of fadeless day,
Lies “the city foursquare,”
It shall never pass away,
And there is “no night there.”
God shall “wipe away all tears”
There’s no death, no pain, nor fears;
And they count not time by years,
For there is “no night there.”
All the gates shall never close,
To “the city foursquare,”
There life’s crystal river flows,
And there is “no night there.”
In “that city foursquare,”
For the Lamb is all the light,
And there is “no night there."
John R Clements
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Eternity in the Hearts of Men
"Forever"
Not talkin' 'bout a year
no not three or four
I don't want that kind of forever
in my life anymore
forever always seems
to be around when it begins
but forever never seems
to be around when it ends
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
People spend so much time
every single day
runnin' 'round all over town
givin' their forever away
but no not me
I won't let my forever roam
and now I hope I can find
my forever a home
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
Like a handless clock with numbers
an infinite of time
no not the forever found
only in the mind
forever always seems
to be around when things begin
but forever never seems
to be around when things end
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
Ben Harper
Such a beautiful song.
Not talkin' 'bout a year
no not three or four
I don't want that kind of forever
in my life anymore
forever always seems
to be around when it begins
but forever never seems
to be around when it ends
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
People spend so much time
every single day
runnin' 'round all over town
givin' their forever away
but no not me
I won't let my forever roam
and now I hope I can find
my forever a home
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
Like a handless clock with numbers
an infinite of time
no not the forever found
only in the mind
forever always seems
to be around when things begin
but forever never seems
to be around when things end
so give me your forever
please your forever
not a day less will do
from you
Ben Harper
Such a beautiful song.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Joshua Radin wrote a song for me!
Not really, but it is called:
"Amy's Song"
You asked me to write a tune
All about the things that go wrong
And then you asked me to come home soon
To the place where I belong
But you stand on the other side
Of the line in this place
And you can't see me, you are blind
And this you can fake
No, this you can fake.
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
And I don't know if I can write about
Chosen walls and the things you feel
And I don't know if I can sing aloud
Closing doors showing you what's real
But I know when I close my eyes,
Late at night, there's only one thing
The night's shown that she can lie
Its your face, show me something
Can you show me something
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
What do you want me to say
All I know is love - it's ok
I'll write what I know
And you do the same
Tell me I'm sane.
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
"Amy's Song"
You asked me to write a tune
All about the things that go wrong
And then you asked me to come home soon
To the place where I belong
But you stand on the other side
Of the line in this place
And you can't see me, you are blind
And this you can fake
No, this you can fake.
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
And I don't know if I can write about
Chosen walls and the things you feel
And I don't know if I can sing aloud
Closing doors showing you what's real
But I know when I close my eyes,
Late at night, there's only one thing
The night's shown that she can lie
Its your face, show me something
Can you show me something
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
What do you want me to say
All I know is love - it's ok
I'll write what I know
And you do the same
Tell me I'm sane.
And sometimes, sometimes I wanna be
I scream that I wanna be
Anyone but me.
Eugenics
How terrifying is this phrase:
"Modern birth control methods, the argument goes,
brought us quantity control; the addition of prenatal
testing offers a system of quality control."
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Welcome Home
Sheets are swaying from an old clothesline,
like a row of captured ghosts, over old dead grass. Was never much, but we made the most.
Welcome Home....
Peel the scars from off my back. I don't need them anymore. You can throw them out or keep them in your mason jars.
I've come home.
Radical Face.
like a row of captured ghosts, over old dead grass. Was never much, but we made the most.
Welcome Home....
Peel the scars from off my back. I don't need them anymore. You can throw them out or keep them in your mason jars.
I've come home.
Radical Face.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
a satiety of wonder
Speaking of a man first seeing the miracle of sky and storm:
"How different we are who have become jaded with a satiety of wonder. 'It is not by our superior insight that we escape the difficulty,' says Carlyle, 'it is by our superior levity, our inattention, our want of insight. It is not by our thinking that we cease to wonder at it... we call that fire of the black cloud electricity, and lecture learnedly about it, and grind the like of it out of glass and silk: but what is it? Whence it comes? Whither goes it? Science has done much for us; but it is a poor science that would hide from us the great depth of Nescience (absence of knowledge), whither we can never penetrate, on which all science swims as a mere superficial film. This world, after all our science and sciences, is still a miracle; wonderful, inscrutable, magical and more, to whosoever will think of it.'"
AW Tozer and Thomas Carlyle in The Knowledge of the Holy
"How different we are who have become jaded with a satiety of wonder. 'It is not by our superior insight that we escape the difficulty,' says Carlyle, 'it is by our superior levity, our inattention, our want of insight. It is not by our thinking that we cease to wonder at it... we call that fire of the black cloud electricity, and lecture learnedly about it, and grind the like of it out of glass and silk: but what is it? Whence it comes? Whither goes it? Science has done much for us; but it is a poor science that would hide from us the great depth of Nescience (absence of knowledge), whither we can never penetrate, on which all science swims as a mere superficial film. This world, after all our science and sciences, is still a miracle; wonderful, inscrutable, magical and more, to whosoever will think of it.'"
AW Tozer and Thomas Carlyle in The Knowledge of the Holy
Monday, August 16, 2010
Swing Wide
I caught myself
Looking in the mirror
Wishing I was someone else
Cause I was born
With a bleeding heart
And veins of loneliness
And I know it,
I’ve seen it,
I’ve held it in my arms
But love can’t seem to break me down
And I’ve pleaded, I’ve begged
And I’ve bloodied my eyes
Just to feel it
To believe it will stick around
Swing wide the glimmering gates
I told myself
The habits and secrets
Were just to get me through
To get me through the nights
But I got lost
In a world of angles
In a city of greys and lies
And I feel it, I taste it
This longing to be free
Oh, the joy of believing like a child
So you, you there listening
Will you send up a prayer
For me
To help me find the light
Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again
One day I believe
I will open up my eyes
To see the good work that was begun
And I’ll be the only thing I’ve ever wanted to be
And I’ll know that I belong
Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again
Words and Music: Andrew Osenga
Looking in the mirror
Wishing I was someone else
Cause I was born
With a bleeding heart
And veins of loneliness
And I know it,
I’ve seen it,
I’ve held it in my arms
But love can’t seem to break me down
And I’ve pleaded, I’ve begged
And I’ve bloodied my eyes
Just to feel it
To believe it will stick around
Swing wide the glimmering gates
I told myself
The habits and secrets
Were just to get me through
To get me through the nights
But I got lost
In a world of angles
In a city of greys and lies
And I feel it, I taste it
This longing to be free
Oh, the joy of believing like a child
So you, you there listening
Will you send up a prayer
For me
To help me find the light
Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again
One day I believe
I will open up my eyes
To see the good work that was begun
And I’ll be the only thing I’ve ever wanted to be
And I’ll know that I belong
Swing wide the glimmering gates
Leave your pride and pain
Swing wide the glimmering gates
And be innocent again
Words and Music: Andrew Osenga
Friday, August 13, 2010
Top Five Sci-Fi Univi (thats my new geeky plural for universe)
Because BeefyGeek isn't the only nerd around here.
In no particular order...
-The Ender Universe by Orson Scott Card. It begins with the Hugo winning Ender’s Game. But it doesn’t stop there. Oh no. Nine books in the world so far and he probably has more up his sleeve.
Why I love it:
-First and foremost it is super character driven, I want to name at least one of my children after one of the characters if that tells you how much I love them.
-Great writing.
- Ender is an AMAZING Christ type who just gets better as you keep reading.
-It has some pretty good science-y stuff (i.e. faster than light speed communication, interesting gravity manipulation, cool weapons).
-Really awesome futuristic politics (Card calls it “the great game”)
- It has some myth-like components.
-He portrays children as being real people.
-It has good morals. Sounds like a really boring Christian-y type thing to say, but I can’t help it. I love that the sympathetic characters in the books believe in good and evil and save sex for marriage. I could write for Focus on the Family!
-Good alien/human interaction. I’m very picky about my aliens.
-The Terminator Universe originally by James Cameron.
I grew up watching these movies and they are just a part of me. I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not… ALTHOUGH, I have to say after squealing with delight the first time I saw a preview for CHRISTIAN BALE as JOHN CONNER… I haven’t yet gotten around to seeing Judgement Day. So I may have to re-write this after I do. I also just started The Sarah Conner Chronicles on Netflix… and its awesome. I was soooo disappointed that I couldn’t watch it tonight ‘cause the internet is down.
Why I love it:
-John Conner is just so epically legendary. I mean really… He’s John Conner. I’d follow him into battle with a sling shot and a bike helmet.
- Its scary without being horror. I don’t do horror. At all.
- As a back to nature gal…I distrust machines and look forward to the day when you join me.
- I love Arnold. I can’t help it. He’s just so ridiculous.
-The strong woman I guess… I don’t think of myself as a feminist, but I can’t help loving it when a girl kicks some serious bad guy behind.
-The Firefly/Serenity Universe by Joss Wheadlon. Just discovered this. A few years too late as usual. It’s definitely getting included on my next Favorite Things post. Why I love it:
- Its hilarious.
-It has great ship design. That sounds weird. But it does.
-Really amazing ensemble cast.
- No aliens. “We don’t need no stinking aliens.” This keeps it from feeling too much like Star Wars.
- The whole Union Vs. Confederacy thing going on. I could see it happening.
- Some people hated the who "space western" thing. But I loved it. Space is the final frontier, right? And if we really space traveled everything wouldn't be all shiny everywhere we went.
-River. She’s just amazing. Another girl that kicks butt… I’m starting to see a pattern here.
-I can’t explain but I want to be on that ship in that Universe. That means I love it, right? It just makes you wanna be a part of it.
-What’s not to love? It deserves its own post.
-The Matrix. It’s been talked about enough. It was awesome. References to it creep up everywhere. It’s a great analogy for Christianity, which to me means it tells the True Story. (“…an artist uses lies to tell the truth.”) Plus Neo is so cute. I have a thing for half-Asians.
-The universe of CS Lewis’s Space Trilogy: So this sort of blurs the line between fantasy and sci-fi and religious myth, but seeing as they are three of my favorite books, I’m gonna go ahead and include it. But it needs its own post. Suffice to say CS Lewis wrote it.
Honorable mention to Star Wars…I do love the universe which is technically what this post is about BUT, we just re-watched the more recent movies and… I just can’t bring myself to include it in this list. If only he had stopped before he cast Hayden Christiansen.
In no particular order...
-The Ender Universe by Orson Scott Card. It begins with the Hugo winning Ender’s Game. But it doesn’t stop there. Oh no. Nine books in the world so far and he probably has more up his sleeve.
Why I love it:
-First and foremost it is super character driven, I want to name at least one of my children after one of the characters if that tells you how much I love them.
-Great writing.
- Ender is an AMAZING Christ type who just gets better as you keep reading.
-It has some pretty good science-y stuff (i.e. faster than light speed communication, interesting gravity manipulation, cool weapons).
-Really awesome futuristic politics (Card calls it “the great game”)
- It has some myth-like components.
-He portrays children as being real people.
-It has good morals. Sounds like a really boring Christian-y type thing to say, but I can’t help it. I love that the sympathetic characters in the books believe in good and evil and save sex for marriage. I could write for Focus on the Family!
-Good alien/human interaction. I’m very picky about my aliens.
-The Terminator Universe originally by James Cameron.
I grew up watching these movies and they are just a part of me. I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not… ALTHOUGH, I have to say after squealing with delight the first time I saw a preview for CHRISTIAN BALE as JOHN CONNER… I haven’t yet gotten around to seeing Judgement Day. So I may have to re-write this after I do. I also just started The Sarah Conner Chronicles on Netflix… and its awesome. I was soooo disappointed that I couldn’t watch it tonight ‘cause the internet is down.
Why I love it:
-John Conner is just so epically legendary. I mean really… He’s John Conner. I’d follow him into battle with a sling shot and a bike helmet.
- Its scary without being horror. I don’t do horror. At all.
- As a back to nature gal…I distrust machines and look forward to the day when you join me.
- I love Arnold. I can’t help it. He’s just so ridiculous.
-The strong woman I guess… I don’t think of myself as a feminist, but I can’t help loving it when a girl kicks some serious bad guy behind.
-The Firefly/Serenity Universe by Joss Wheadlon. Just discovered this. A few years too late as usual. It’s definitely getting included on my next Favorite Things post. Why I love it:
- Its hilarious.
-It has great ship design. That sounds weird. But it does.
-Really amazing ensemble cast.
- No aliens. “We don’t need no stinking aliens.” This keeps it from feeling too much like Star Wars.
- The whole Union Vs. Confederacy thing going on. I could see it happening.
- Some people hated the who "space western" thing. But I loved it. Space is the final frontier, right? And if we really space traveled everything wouldn't be all shiny everywhere we went.
-River. She’s just amazing. Another girl that kicks butt… I’m starting to see a pattern here.
-I can’t explain but I want to be on that ship in that Universe. That means I love it, right? It just makes you wanna be a part of it.
-What’s not to love? It deserves its own post.
-The Matrix. It’s been talked about enough. It was awesome. References to it creep up everywhere. It’s a great analogy for Christianity, which to me means it tells the True Story. (“…an artist uses lies to tell the truth.”) Plus Neo is so cute. I have a thing for half-Asians.
-The universe of CS Lewis’s Space Trilogy: So this sort of blurs the line between fantasy and sci-fi and religious myth, but seeing as they are three of my favorite books, I’m gonna go ahead and include it. But it needs its own post. Suffice to say CS Lewis wrote it.
Honorable mention to Star Wars…I do love the universe which is technically what this post is about BUT, we just re-watched the more recent movies and… I just can’t bring myself to include it in this list. If only he had stopped before he cast Hayden Christiansen.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
If you want to make God laugh...
"Higher up and deeper in..."
CS Lewis
"God always answers us in the deeps, never in the shallows of our soul."
Amy Carmichael
CS Lewis
"God always answers us in the deeps, never in the shallows of our soul."
Amy Carmichael
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Photographers are magic
How do photographers make stuff look picturesque that is really just junk?
Case in point: this guy. Thanks to this lovely blogger for the recommendation.
Case in point: this guy. Thanks to this lovely blogger for the recommendation.
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